Are You A Pervert?
You have a problem with abnormal sexual desires? The majority of people experience problems with living out their sexuality for many different reasons. The term "perversion" is very subjective and has to be seen in the proper cultural context. Some people even believe they are perverts, when they are in fact totally healthy.
Since there are many different reasons for, and different kinds of perversions, it is not easy to provide a simple "How-To". The best advice is to get professional help.
What is perversion?
Psychologists use the term "perversion" for sexual desires and related patterns of acting, where those patterns heavily diverge from what most people see as normal. This means mostly, that the person doesn't aim at having relationships, but only looks for stimuli, which target the satisfaction of sexual impulses. Often the goal isn't sexual intercourse, but different activities. People, who feel attracted to children, animals or objects, are considered to be perverse. There are different kinds of perversions, for example
- Exhibitionism (exposure of parts of the body to another person)
- Fetishism (sexual arousal brought on by objects, situations or body parts not conventionally viewed as being sexual in nature)
- Masochism (the tendency to derive pleasure, esp. sexual gratification, from one's own pain or humiliation)
- Necrophilism (Sex with dead bodies)
- Pedophilia (sexual attraction to children)
- Sadism (Hurting and discriminating others)
- Zoophilia (Sex with animals)
- Voyeurism (Watching others having sex)
- Coprophilia (Excrements)
It is healthy to have such fantasies, even to live some of them, unless they develop a strong pull to the point, where normal sexuality does not interest/satisfy you anymore (and of course, when people get harmed).
Causes of perversion
Becoming a pervert can be caused by different reasons, the most prominent being
- supression of emotions,
- negation of the overall need for sexuality,
- inaccurate self-image,
- neurological malfunctions (which are rare),
- social and cultural discrepancies,
Being perverse is usually a matter of habit. You start with finding out, that you like a certain thing and following the impulse. By repeating the pattern you get used to it until it is a normality to you, and all of a sudden you realize, that you are no longer within the main stream.
There are two main forms, in which perversion may afflict you: It can just extend your spectrum of enjoyment, or it narrows it down. The latter is to be considered a problem.
Am I a pervert?
You are suffering a serious condition when your desires are causing problems in the real world. These may be
- Being ashamed of what you want,
- you harm yourself,
- others feel offended,
- others are harmed,
- you tend towards illegal things,
- the desires interrupt your life (E.g. you dare not to engage in a relationship),
- and more.
- Limiting the sexual images already in your head is of little value if you let your imagination run free.
- Intense thoughts tend to re-affirm themselves, when you allow them to fill your mind. Try to keep perverted thoughts and images out of your mind, without creating too much nor too little pressure, do small steps. Avoid things that affirmate your perversion, such as porn, certain people. Try to observe, what is triggering intensive unwanted thoughts and try to avoid the triggers.
- Get help. Confide in a friend or family member. They can help you along your journey and make it easier. Contact supporting groups and/or professionals. If you're uncertain, any doctor can help you with further hints.
- Think of your mind like a swimming pool, and the perverted images as algae. Once you get something disgusting into a pool, it takes a long time to get it out. but if you control the influx, and stop the algae that's already in the pool from reproducing, you can eventually cleanse your mind.
- Trying to hide your perversion will only increase pressure. You need a way to compensate.Find someone, you can talk to about it. It might be a bad idea to talk to persons with similar interests, as you would probably confirm yourself instead of making it better. Talk to someone, who wouldn't initially understand your perversion, to give you a chance for deeper reflection.
- Do not get a boyfriend or girlfriend, unless you are able to talk about your perversion or find a healthy way to live (with) it.
- If you are married, you should really do something about your perversion. Try to find a way to talk about the situation with your partner. Professional assistance can help you with learning to overcome the fear of destroying your marriage.
Culled from http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Less-Perverted
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